Pun­ish­ment of a slave for bad behavior

Pun­ish­ment of a slave is a penalty used in BDSM slave train­ing by a Mas­ter show­ing dis­plea­sure with unac­cept­able behav­ior.  In the BDSM lifestyle there is usu­ally a dis­tinc­tion made between pun­ish­ment and dis­ci­pline.

B.E.S.T. slave train­ing advo­cates the use of both in the train­ing of a slave.

Dis­ic­pline and Pun­ish­ment of a slave dur­ing training

Dis­ci­pline is train­ing employed by the Mas­ter to teach proper behav­ior and obe­di­ence. Dis­ci­pline is described as instruc­tion and exer­cise; train­ing, whether phys­i­cal, men­tal or moral. Gen­er­ally the time spent train­ing your slave to kneel, stand, speak and so on is defined as dis­ci­pline slave train­ing. It is also train­ing to adjust atti­tude. One of the uses is to teach and prac­tice proper behavior.

Pun­ish­ment is cor­rect­ing a slave’s bad behav­ior. It’s a penalty imposed on the slave for wrong­do­ing. It’s used after the slave has dis­played bad behav­ior to:

•  demon­strate to the slave that her Mas­ter is displeased,
•  show that the behav­ior was unac­cept­able and her actions have con­se­quences and
•  pro­vide rein­force­ment for a change to proper behavior.

slave pun­ish­ment focuses on bad behav­ior, inten­tional or not. Because behav­ioral mod­i­fi­ca­tion is impor­tant; pun­ish­ment can be admin­is­tered to the slave even if the bad behav­ior is unin­ten­tional. How­ever, the method and sever­ity of pun­ish­ment may very depend­ing on if the behav­ior was inten­tional or unintentional.

Pun­ish­ment of a slave should always aim to improve the slave’s behav­ior or remove com­pletely bad behavior. The slave may not like the con­se­quences that her Mas­ter applies, but she accepts them because they apply to her and are for her bet­ter­ment.  Pun­ish­ment is NOT role play.  It is to cor­rect a real prob­lem using real punishment.

Slave Pun­ish­ment for bad behav­ior does not always involve cor­po­ral pun­ish­ment. Pun­ish­ment is any­thing admin­is­tered by the Mas­ter that is very uncom­fort­able to the slave for the pur­pose of chang­ing behav­ior. It could be hav­ing the slave stand in the closet, go to bed early, restric­tion of priv­i­leges, ignor­ing her, caging, bondage,  refus­ing to allow her to serve you  for a period of time or many other forms.

Exam­ple: (ping pong ball and/or egg timer)  A ping pong ball can be used for both dis­ci­pline and pun­ish­ment, depend­ing on how applied. A slave can be told to hold a ping pong ball to a wall with her nose for a period of time.She can be placed in var­i­ous posi­tions then the Mas­ter starts an egg timer and the slave must remain in that posi­tion until the egg timer alarms. She is then given a sec­ond posi­tion to hold and the egg timer is reset. This can go as long as you wish, you can keep set­ting the timer and giv­ing her new posi­tions. Chal­leng­ing posi­tions can be used for pun­ish­ment. Let your imag­i­na­tion be your guide. Many egg timers can be set for 30 min­utes or more, if you wish to make her hold a posi­tion that long.

Pun­ish­ing a slave can be the tak­ing away of priv­i­leges; loss of the use of a com­puter, car, or television.

Another slave pun­ish­ment could be to have her repeat­edly write out a sen­tence or thought on paper. This is help­ful is he is not with his slave and wants to see a pos­i­tive action taken by her before he gets home. He can tell her to write what she has done wrong or what she needs to do on paper sev­eral time and show him when he gets home. He can also sent her some place (another room) to write while he does some­thing else.

In the bondage sec­tion of this web­site, I dis­cuss some uses of bondage as dis­ci­pline or slave or sub­mis­sive punishment.

If the slave is a heavy masochist, then some­thing other than cor­po­ral pun­ish­ment might be war­ranted. It goes with­out say­ing, that pun­ish­ment is not intended to be fun or pro­vide plea­sure. A slave should not be allowed to mis­be­have to ful­fill her masochist needs and never rewarded for bad behav­ior. Don’t let what you intend to be a pun­ish­ment be a rein­force­ment for bad behav­ior. Being placed behind the couch in the liv­ing room or den for an after­noon can teach her a valu­able les­son. If she makes a noise or dis­rupts you in any way, her time behind the couch can be extended. The use of phys­i­cal bondage is not nec­es­sary, using men­tal bondage by instruct­ing her to remain quite, still and out of site. In gen­eral, the more she loves pain, the less it should be rou­tinely applied as pun­ish­ment and the more care it takes in admin­is­ter­ing pain as punishment.

To enable a slave to prop­erly serve you on a daily basis, she should have full knowl­edge of what behav­ior is expected of her. What is expected of her should be con­stant and clearly defined by her Mas­ter. This is why writ­ten rules, posi­tions descrip­tions, and pro­to­cols are impor­tant. The impor­tance of dis­ci­pline train­ing and com­mu­ni­ca­tion can not be under­stated in the over­all train­ing process.

As I have stated in other por­tions of this web­site, not all Mas­ters believe in using writ­ten rules, guide­lines, and pro­to­cols. That of course is their deci­sion. It is my opin­ion that writ­ten rules help pro­vide a clear path for the slave and a stronger foun­da­tion for her change. I’ll admit it takes more time and effort, but I believe the effort is worth it.

slave Pun­ish­ment is a type of coer­cive power.

Coer­cive power is one of the 5 forms of inter­per­sonal power a Mas­ter has over his slave (s).

Coer­cive  power (author­ity)  is impos­ing by the Master’s will, rules, expected behav­ior  upon his slave (s) by the use of  pun­ish­ment or  sim­ply the threat of its exis­tence.     Coer­cive power although impor­tant is not always the best and most effec­tive form of power a Mas­ter has over his slave.

For more infor­ma­tion on Inter­per­sonal Power

 

Cor­po­ral Pun­ish­ment in BDSM sub­mis­sion or slave Training:

Cor­po­ral pun­ish­ment is defined in this sec­tion as a delib­er­ate inflec­tion of pain used in the cor­rect of an adult slave’s mis­be­hav­ior. The slave agrees as part of the cor­rec­tion process and heal­ing processes that she will accept her punishment.

I divide cor­po­ral pun­ish­ment into two cat­e­gories; imme­di­ate and formal.

Imme­di­ate pun­ish­ment is usu­ally less intense and of a much shorter dura­tion than for­mal. The pur­pose of imme­di­ate pun­ish­ment is to imme­di­ately cor­rect the slave for an infrac­tion that is caused by a lack of atten­tion to detail dur­ing train­ing or to rein­force changes in auto­matic responses (habits), (fail­ure to main­tain eyes down as stated in the rules).

I have often heard slaves or sub­mis­sives say that the worst pun­ish­ment they could receive is the knowl­edge that their Mas­ter is dis­pleased with their actions and this is worse than any cor­po­ral pun­ish­ment that he could admin­is­ter to her.

I fully believe that a good slave or sub­mis­sive will feel sor­row­ful for dis­pleas­ing her Mas­ter and this will pro­vide moti­va­tion to cor­rect her behav­ior, but I don’t believe that this sor­row is always enough to fos­ter future cor­rect behav­ior. This is espe­cially true when train­ing her to change nor­mal daily behav­ior (habits and rou­tines). Just telling her that she has made a mis­take is not enough to insure change when the focus is on chang­ing habits and rou­tines. Pun­ish­ment pro­vides moti­va­tion to change.

Imme­di­ate slave pun­ish­ment is use­ful where a change in habits and rou­tine behav­ior is required. Two exam­ples are when a slave does not say “Sir”, each time she is address­ing her Mas­ter or main­tain­ing “eyes down” in her Master’s pres­ence. These are habits you want her to adopt and imme­di­ate pun­ish­ment is effec­tive when she slips dur­ing train­ing. A behav­ior­ist would prob­a­bly call this stimuli-response type train­ing instead of mak­ing an attempt to chang­ing cog­ni­tive thinking.

Now, this is eas­ier said than done. Some actions that the Mas­ter require the slave to do may require dis­ci­pline train­ing and time to com­pletely cor­rect. Most habits and rou­tines require not only knowl­edge but lots of prac­tice to suc­cess­fully change.

If you are to live in a 24/7 Master/slave rela­tion­ship, many new behav­iors have to be ingrained into the slave. They have to become part of her nor­mal daily rou­tine. This is achieved by pro­vid­ing her with the knowl­edge of what you expect, set­ting goals, apply­ing dis­ci­pline and pun­ish­ment, pro­vid­ing pos­i­tive rein­force­ment for cor­rect behav­ior and encour­age­ment. Pun­ish­ment is only one tool used in the BDSM lifestyle for slave training.

For­mal Pun­ish­ment of a slave

For­mal slave pun­ish­ment is for more seri­ous vio­la­tions of the rules. It‘s not a result of a change in a habit but a con­scious mis­be­hav­ior or a mis­be­hav­ior that a rea­son­able slave would be expected to know.

Exam­ples are the inten­tional fail­ure to dis­close impor­tant infor­ma­tion to her Mas­ter or fail­ure to do a par­tic­u­lar assign­ment in the allot­ted time (after receiv­ing instruc­tions). These are atti­tude prob­lems that cause bad behav­iors. This is also an exam­ple where a slave’s sor­row for dis­pleas­ing her Mas­ter may not be enough to cor­rect behav­ior. She was aware of her Master’s instruc­tions and still failed to obey. She had full knowl­edge ahead of time that her Mas­ter would be dis­pleased and pun­ish­ment was likely.

Very often, stat­ing that slave pun­ish­ment is a log­i­cal con­se­quence of bad behav­ior is an over sim­pli­fi­ca­tion of the prob­lem. Yes, what the Mas­ter sees is bad behav­ior, but more than likely the bad behav­ior is a result of incor­rect (faulty) think­ing, fail­ure to pay atten­tion to detail or other men­tal lapses. We think, then we feel then we act. In other words, it’s her think­ing (atti­tude) that caused bad behav­ior. There­fore, only apply­ing cor­po­ral pun­ish­ment is not always the best action that a Mas­ter can take to cor­rect the problem.

Exam­in­ing and con­fronting the faulty think­ing, before pun­ish­ment, is an impor­tant part of the over­all cor­rec­tion of behav­ior. If faulty think­ing is addressed and cor­rected, behav­ior will auto­mat­i­cally be changed. (Details on address­ing faulty think­ing is dis­cussed in other sec­tions of this website.)

Steps in For­mal Pun­ish­ment of a slave

In most cases, for­mal cor­po­ral slave pun­ish­ment should have sev­eral steps.

Step 1 — After dis­cov­er­ing the behav­ior that needs cor­rect­ing, it’s often advis­able to dis­cuss with the slave what caused her bad behav­ior. What was she think­ing? Why did she act that way? Why did she make that choice? How is the choice she made help­ful in her slave train­ing? Is she seri­ous about her training?

You should also make your dis­plea­sure with her behav­ior and think­ing known to her. Take time to insure she knows the depth of your displeasure.

Step 2 — Then the slave should be sent off, by her­self, to think about her wrong doing and the pun­ish­ment that will surely come soon.

Step 3 — She then should to called for and told to present her­self in a pun­ish­ment posi­tion. A short lec­ture should be given before pun­ish­ment. Here you can again tell her of your dis­plea­sure and what is expected of her in the future.

Step 4 — Then comes the actual pun­ish­ment. The slave should not be allowed to reach a frame of mind that would allow her to lessen the effect of the pun­ish­ment (sub­space or men­tal pain block­ing tech­niques). She should be required to say “Thank you, Sir” after each stroke, and keep count of each stroke. If she shows signs of going into sub­space or block­ing the pain, force her out of that men­tal state, before con­tin­u­ing. Using a dif­fer­ent instru­ment to pun­ish her with than you would use for plea­sure is advisable.

Step 5 — Imme­di­ately after the pun­ish­ment, the slave should be sent off, (to a cor­ner) by her­self, for a period of time to reflect on her punishment.

After com­ple­tion of all five steps, you should reas­sure the slave that her pay­ment for the wrong doing is over, but you expect cor­rect behav­ior in the future. Do not keep harp­ing on the bad behav­ior after pun­ish­ing her. Com­ple­tion of the 5 steps should be an end­ing point for her punishment.

Help­ful hints in slave punishment:

Learned behav­iors tend to become habits and, there­fore, are reg­u­larly repeated when the oppor­tu­nity arises. Because of this, it is par­tic­u­larly impor­tant that pun­ish­ment be applied imme­di­ately after the first behav­ioral devi­a­tion occurs, or as soon as pos­si­ble, rather than after numer­ous devi­a­tions have estab­lished unde­sir­able behav­ioral pat­terns. The longer an unac­cept­able behav­ior is allowed to con­tinue, the harder it is to change that behavior.

Some con­sider alter­ing behav­ior as hav­ing six steps that include:

1) describ­ing the unde­sired behav­ior to the slave,

2) indi­cat­ing to the slave why the behav­ior is undesirable,

3) deter­min­ing antecedents and rein­forcers for the unde­sir­able behavior,

4) elim­i­nat­ing the cause of the unde­sir­able behavior,

5) get­ting the slave to make a com­mit­ment to change the behavior,

6) pro­vid­ing pos­i­tive rein­force­ment when the desired behav­ior occurs and with­hold­ing it or pro­vid­ing pun­ish­ment when it does not occur.

Choos­ing the best rein­force­ment (pos­i­tive or neg­a­tive) for a slave is not always an easy task. To make it eas­ier, here are some guide­lines that are often used in busi­ness that can be applied to slave training.

1) You should make it  Personal:

The rein­forcer must reflect your per­sonal style and must be given in a per­sonal way. Not only, be per­sonal but make it per­sonal to your slave.

2) It must be Sincere:

It’s impor­tant that you mean what you say and are not jok­ing or being dishonest.

3) Be Specific:

The slave must know exactly why she received a par­tic­u­lar rein­forcer. She has to know why she’s is being praised (or pun­ished). Because behav­ior is clearly a com­plex and ongo­ing stream, the con­tin­gency between a behav­ior and the con­se­quence may not be clear. Pin­point the behav­ior that you require.

4) Imme­di­ate:

Rein­force your slave while she is doing what you want. The longer the time between the com­ple­tion of a behav­ior and the deliv­ery of a rein­forc­ing con­se­quence, the less effec­tive the rein­forcer will be.

5) Frequently:

Use the 4:1 gen­eral rule or at least keep it in mind. This means that every time you apply a neg­a­tive con­se­quence, you should find at least four oppor­tu­ni­ties to rein­force a desired behav­ior. By just observ­ing peo­ple you can learn a lot about which rein­forcer is most suitable..

Pun­ish­ment is about car­ing that your slave behaves in a way that best serves, obeys and pleases you.

Books

The clas­sic book “The story of o”  as a look at slave punishment