Caged — let her resist

ASSUMPTIONS for this article:

1. Resis­tance to slave train­ing  is a reac­tion to change due to anxiety.
2. Resis­tance to slave train­ing  occurs when some­thing or some­one causes a threat to some­thing of value. The threat may be real or it may be just a perception.
3.  This threat causes anx­i­ety. Resis­tance to slave train­ing  can occur where there is a gen­uine under­stand­ing of the change or where there is a real mis­un­der­stand­ing, or even almost total igno­rance about it.
4.  Resis­tance to slave train­ing can effect behav­ior, emo­tions, self-image and thoughts.

This is not about “brat play” or any other form of BDSM place. It is about real resis­tance to slave train­ing due  to change. The Mas­ter and slave are seri­ous and this is not a game.

RESISTANCE to slave training:

Resis­tance to slave train­ing is not a cat­e­gory of B.E.S.T. slave train­ing but does deserve spe­cial notice to the trainer. Resis­tance to slave train­ing can often be han­dled as an inter­fer­ing belief with REBT or B.E.S.T. slave train­ing tech­niques. The source of resis­tance to slave train­ing is when the topic, expected behav­ior, sit­u­a­tion or her Mas­ter is viewed as threat­en­ing. Anx­i­ety is present in any response to a threat and the slave feels com­pelled to defend her­self against addi­tional anxiety.

Resis­tance to slave train­ing is a reac­tion to anx­i­ety caused by the change and the treat felt from it. It is not directly aimed at the Mas­ter.  The resis­tance to slave train­ing is directed at change and how it makes her feel.

Resis­tance to slave train­ing — source is anxiety

A slave, like all humans, seeks home­osta­sis and equi­lib­rium in her life. she want sta­bil­ity and any change rocks that boat. It is human nature to resist change. A mas­ter needs to under­stand that in most cases a resis­tance to slave train­ing is not per­sonal or even directed at him but instead is a human reac­tion to anx­i­ety caused by a threat per­ceived from change. In many cases she may very well see that she needs to do what her mas­ter asked to deepen her slav­ery and even want to but this knowl­edge and desire does not always reduce her anxiety.

Resis­tance to slave train­ing is clas­si­fied as inter­nal or external.

Inter­nal resis­tance to slave train­ing is an attempt by the slave to retreat from her Master’s efforts to explore and alter behav­ior and/or beliefs. It is anx­i­ety asso­ci­ated with a change in life sta­tus or atti­tude do to her slave train­ing.  The faster the slave is exposed to change the more the resis­tance  to slave train­ing increases because her anx­i­ety gets stronger faster as she feels overwhelmed.

Open­ness is impor­tant in a Master/slave rela­tion­ship. A lack of open­ness causes stress when a Mas­ter attempts to explore inter­nal feel­ings, and beliefs. Because of the crit­i­cal nature of open­ness in the rela­tion­ship, it should be strongly stressed to the slave early in the train­ing process. It is also impor­tant for the slave to real­ize that you accept her as she is. Yes, you will alter her to serve, obey and please you, but you accept her and want her to feel she can reveal her thoughts and feel­ings to you.

It is a vio­la­tion of her duty as a slave to keep her feel­ings to her­self. If she does open to you, then it is also a vio­la­tion of your duty as a Mas­ter to act in a way that causes her stress for hav­ing the courage of open­ing up her­self to you. you should not encourge her to open her thoughts and feel­ing to you then use and/or hold them again her. you will destroy trust if you act improperly.

One form of inter­nal resis­tances to slave train­ing is called reac­tance. Reac­tance to a loss of free­dom is dis­cussed below in a sep­a­rate sec­tion (Reac­tance to a loss of an impor­tant freedom).

Exter­nal resis­tance to slave train­ing can be caused by anx­i­ety about being depen­dent or close to another per­son. It can develop when the Mas­ter goes faster than the slave feels she is capa­ble of going, there­fore she resists his attempts. Another source of resis­tance to slave train­ing is lack of faith in her Mas­ter or a lack of readi­ness to accept slav­ery. There can also be a resis­tance to slave train­ing due to the amount of time her Mas­ter requires for train­ing when she feels it could be used oth­er­wise or if she is tired or sleepy. Resis­tance to slave train­ing can also be due to emo­tional reac­tions caused by past life expe­ri­ences (flash­backs) that may seem over­whelm­ing to the slave.

The value of resis­tance to slave train­ing to a master

The prin­ci­ple value of this resis­tance to slave train­ing for a Mas­ter is that it gives an indi­ca­tion of how the slave is pro­gress­ing in train­ing. After resis­tance to slave train­ing is seen in the slave then her Mas­ter can ignore, reduce, or uti­lize it. Resis­tance to slave train­ing also is a win­dow into the slave’s defense struc­ture.  You can learn a lot about a slave and how to train her by sim­ply observ­ing what, when and how resis­tance to slave train­ing plays out.

The expres­sions of resis­tance to slave train­ing depends on the slave’s per­son­al­ity. Peo­ple express anx­i­ety dif­fer­ently depend­ing on personality.

Over­com­ing Resis­tance to slave training:

For any of the below tech­niques to work the slave trainee must want to change so she can bet­ter serve, obey and please her master.

Tech­niques for over­com­ing resis­tance to slave training:

1) Ignor­ing, but being aware of it and watch­ing for increases. This may be use­ful if you are not directly deal­ing with the issue at the present time.

2) Minor adap­ta­tions — slow­ing down.

Allow­ing you slave to adjust eas­ier by slow­ing the changes thrust upon her. It is a method of reduc­ing but not remov­ing anx­i­ety. It may cause less stress in the long run by allow­ing trust to grow, allow­ing her more time to analy­sis the changes and the threat it causes her, and your behav­ior. A mas­ter needs to observe the reac­tions of his trainee when he is chang­ing behav­ior rapidly.

3) Tem­po­rary diver­sion — Re-direction to less threat­en­ing areas and return at a later time.

This is another method of tem­porar­ily elim­i­nat­ing or reduc­ing anx­i­ety caused by change. It sim­ply gives a Mas­ter more time to pre­pare a trainee for change.

A Mas­ter should not viewed him­self as being weak if he stops this cur­rent train­ing goals for a short period and re-directs train­ing in an area that causes the trainee less anxiety.

 4) Direct manip­u­la­tion -

a) Exam­i­na­tion of the slave’s use of resis­tance to slave train­ing by exam­in­ing  and ask­ing “how has the slave used resis­tance to her ben­e­fit in the past?”  Often anx­i­ety grows into a tool used to “get your way” and cause oth­ers to back off. It can be a learned defense. Talk about the behav­ior used by the slave when the feel­ings of anx­i­ety are present.

Humans react to change because they:

· fear los­ing some­thing that believe has value, or

· don’t under­stand the change and it will impact them, or

· don’t see any value in chang­ing or it is not log­i­cal to them , or

· find it dif­fi­cult to cope with the new behav­ior caused by the change (can’t cope).

COMMUNICATIONS about resis­tance to slave train­ing and reac­tance to loss of freedom:

Show your slave the value in chang­ing to your required behav­ior. Often pro­vid­ing the slave with more knowl­edge about how the behav­ioral change will affect her and the rela­tion­ship in a pos­i­tive way helps over­come anx­i­ety . Show her the pos­i­tive side of chang­ing her beliefs and behav­ior. Dis­cuss ways to make the change eas­ier in order to enable her to cope with the change. Often the act of chang­ing from one behav­ior to another is more stress­ful than the actual change. Dis­cuss the process of chang­ing. Offer encour­age­ment and let her know you are pleased with her change any behav­ior, this will make addi­tional changes eas­ier.  slave train­ing is in many ways build around encouragement.

b) Reflec­tion on feel­ings of resis­tance Caus­ing the slave to tell you about her resis­tance and why she felt as she did. what past issues cause it.

S. K Piderit (2000) believes that the def­i­n­i­tion of the term resis­tance must incor­po­rate a broader scope. She states that “a review of past empir­i­cal research reveals three dif­fer­ent emphases in con­cep­tu­al­iza­tions of resis­tance: as a cog­ni­tive state, as an emo­tional state, and as a behav­ior” (Piderit, S.K. (2000, Oct). Rethink­ing resis­tance and rec­og­niz­ing ambiva­lence: a mul­ti­di­men­sional view of atti­tudes toward an orga­ni­za­tional change. Acad­emy of Man­age­ment –794. A, 783).

Both inter­nal and exter­nal resis­tance reduces as trust in her Mas­ter builds. Of course, build­ing trust takes time and must be rein­forced with pos­i­tive examples.

In slave train­ing,  a slave’s trust in her Mas­ter involves a belief that her master:

1) has the knowl­edge and skills nec­es­sary to re-educate and re-socialize her, (he has the skills needed do slave training)

2) will keep her safe,

3) will accept own­er­ship of her,  (no pur­pose in slave train­ing with­out a pos­i­tive outcome)

4) will struc­ture her ser­vice in a way that she feels use­ful and  (slave train­ing is about enabling the slave to serve and please)

5) has per­sonal sta­bil­ity and integrity.

c) Threats fol­lowed by action if nec­es­sary to moti­vate This involves set­ting a goal as part of slave train­ing. Then clearly stat­ing con­se­quences for fail­ing to meet the goals. This can also mean pun­ish­ment for not meet­ing the goals. .

d) Direct con­fronta­tion or direct ques­tion­ing  This means you force your trainee to dis­cuss the source of her resis­tance and dis­cuss ways of reduc­ing her anxiety.

 It is con­fronting the root cause. It is not just behav­ioral change but exam­in­ing emo­tions and thoughts. The Mas­ter can use REBT and CHOICE THERAPY con­cepts here. you can focus on show­ing her the logic of change or the illog­i­cal stance of resist­ing change.

e) Over­whelm­ing force (mean­ing that she knows she will not change her Master’s mind by resis­tance or reactance).

 He has issued an order and expects it obeyed. He had made the choice of her behav­ior. Her only choice is to change her behav­ior to that her Mas­ter wishes. If she main­tains her slav­ery, she is help­less to change her behav­ior in the long run because her mas­ter con­trols it.

She is help­less to change her behav­ior there­fore her atti­tude must change in order to reduce the men­tal con­flict. The feel­ing of help­less­ness to change her own behav­ior is impor­tant in slave train­ing. she seeks peace and calm­ness in her life and if her behav­ior is owned and con­trolled then she must change her atti­tude to achieve it (see Cog­ni­tive Dis­so­nance The­ory below).

This requires that a mas­ter has already estab­lished his inter­per­sonal forms of power, or the ways one per­son man­ages, trains and con­trols another. They are listed below.

NOTE: The term help­less­ness as used here means:

that in order to main­tain her slav­ery or con­tinue on the right path in her slave train­ing and not dis­please her Mas­ter, she is help­less to change her behav­ior. Her Mas­ter deter­mines her behav­ior. It means that she has made a deci­sion to allow her Mas­ter the right to make her behav­ioral choices for her. He has made a choice of how he wish­ers her to behave there­fore she is help­less to change her behav­ior and be a slave. If she rejects his choice she is reject­ing her her oath to allow him to own her choices and is act­ing out­side her slavery.

Reac­tance to a loss of an impor­tant free­dom due to slave training:

Reac­tance to loss of free­dom in slave train­ing is a type of inter­nal resis­tance that should be expected from a slave dur­ing train­ing. Rec­og­niz­ing and over­com­ing reac­tance is impor­tant in slave training.

Reac­tance to loss of free­dom in slave train­ing occurs when the slave per­ceives a threat to her free­doms or and actual ” loss of a free­dom” that is impor­tant to her and this moti­vates her to attempt to restore that free­dom. The the­ory also asso­ciates the state of reac­tance with emo­tional stress, anx­i­ety, resis­tance and strug­gle for the slave, and she is moti­vated to escape from these feelings.

Reac­tance to loss of free­dom in slave train­ing is not a resis­tance to slave train­ing to the time involved in train­ing or even a resis­tance to her Mas­ters efforts to train her, it is a resis­tance to a “loss of a free­dom” and the emo­tional stress that this loss causes her. she attempts to regain this free­dom usu­ally by an emo­tional reac­tion to the change. This is a point that is often mis­un­der­stood. It is a per­sonal resis­tance to a loss of a free­dom as opposed to a resis­tance to her Mas­ter. How­ever, her way of rebelling against the loss of free­dom may be seen as resis­tance to her Master.

Restated, reac­tance is a resis­tance to a thing (loss of free­dom) not a per­son. A slave has a reac­tance to loos­ing con­trol as opposed to resist­ing her Master.

 Exam­ple 1) If a slave has taken pride in choos­ing her own cloth­ing to wear all her life and her Mas­ter now chooses her cloth­ing for her, the resis­tance in not against her Mas­ter, it is again the loss of freedom.

 Exam­ple 2) If a slave has agreed to move in with her Mas­ter to become a 24/7 slave, she may, at the last minute, have a reac­tance to the loss of free­dom and pri­vacy she knows in com­ing. It is an inter­nal con­flict instead of a reac­tion against her Master.

Reac­tance to loss of free­dom and a Master’s over­whelm­ing force