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being over for discipline

One of the things a new master does not always understand is that a slave chooses to be dominated and her personal freedom comes from enslavement.  She is not happy making all the decisions and doing everything “her way”.  She craves and needs a master’s guidance and control.  She is free to be herself when enslaved.  Some of you may have notices in the past that a slave may actually calm down and relax with she is stripped of freedom. she feels she is home when the feels her master’s control all around in her.

slave freedom

image by China Hamilton and used with his permission

her freedom comes from being owned

This is not always easy for her to accept that she needs enslaved but with time she will see where her happiness lies.  She feels it but does not always understand why.   Often a master’s disciplne even if harsh puts her at ease and puts her in into a sense of peace.  There is a calmness in being owned that the vanilla world will not understand.   

In the beginning she may test her master to see if he is strong enough to actually control her and give her what she needs. Disciple is far easier for her to take than no control of a Master’s hand.

This is a subject I often take time to explan to a new master.  He can move ahead and control her, guide her, set rules, set protocols, do position training and she will accept.  She may be frustrated but often that is because she does not do it correctly in the beginning. As a master set your goals and don’t second guess youself.  She wants your leadership and control.




Freedom in slavery — 14 Comments

  1. this very much describes exactly what i do!!
    its almost as if this girl wrote this as she definitely tries expression of this to others.
    i can’t be Masters by someone who can’t adhere to their word. changes their mind and the rules all the time.
    wants my advise.
    i dont want to be Dominant to a Master.
    i need that leadership.
    i can’t stand being told i have as much power over my Master ad He does i, then He’s returning the power i gave up.
    it has left me confused, angry, hurt when this has happened in the past.
    i desire to be controlled, to have a strong,firm Master who doesn’t always waver.
    these men who don’t want to discipline me,for fear of making me angry… really anger me!!!
    i know what my offer of slavery mean and it burns me to be called a goddess, etc.
    i have screamed in the past “i am slave, Now do something with me,to prove You are a Master!”
    lol…but very true all the same.
    sometimes it feels like i run in circles with Dom’s who proclaim they can master this girl.
    maybe she just not for beginners?
    she Does NOT want to tell Another how to be her Master! it’s frustrating and truly hurts at times,as she wonders “Is there anybody out there??” 🙂

  2. @kyymba Thank you for a very passionate reply . I think you made your position clear.

    But this is something I do hear from subs/slaves. It is their nature to be submissive and owned. They want it. They don’t want to tell you how to own them. It is called “Topping from the bottom” What is the point if they have to do it?

  3. Sir, Thank You for a post, so very true.
    This girl hopes she wasn’t overly passionate?
    But yes the mere thought of it angered her as it has happened so many times.
    And the excitement of possibly a Master and then the disappoint, and hurt to find out it was a lesson in you, He was seeking.
    this girl is very passionate about this topic!
    Thank You Sir,

  4. Dear Cuffsmaster,

    First of all, happy New Year to you and all Masters and slaves.

    I fully agree with your post. i feel good because i am owned and i have to obey. My Master set the rules and i obey them, even when it’s difficult. Specially when it’s difficult i know my Master will guide me and bring me further on the road that is mine.
    For me my freedom comes from being a slave and accepting the full consequence that it means. i will obey my Master, whatever and that gives me in the end peace of mind.


  5. This is so true! You’re right. Being enslaved is like being at home in your comfort zone. Sometimes things just feel so overwhelming and you just want to give the power over to someone else.

  6. The awareness that we are speaking of is not so much a question of constant awareness as of an object of mind, but it is a matter of becoming one with awareness, becoming one with open space. This means becoming one with the actual things with which you are dealing as well.
    Surrendering to your Owner is not an admission of defeat or personal inadequacy. True surrender requires the courage to face the unknown and trust in the guide you have chosen to lead you into the unexplored territory. When you have found within yourself the courage and trust required to surrender that is a victory to savor.

    When There is a COMPLETE trust within the Dominant -Master and the Sub – Slave partner ,there is freedom.

    Having said that i salute you till next Time.
    Myself too, is yet learning and will always be…and that is why when you love what you are doing ,you want to be better, for yourself and for the others around you.

    With effect and no with regret ,

  7. This is so true, Sir. In finding the one whom a girl can surrender to totally there is a peace and a feeling of relief! A Master who exudes confidence and is consistent is a rare thing. But this girl has found that with persistence and not giving up He just might pop up when least expected. There is a freedom in slavery that the vanilla world will never understand. It is about letting go and becoming and it can be very freeing.

  8. think that women make better doms/mistresses than men make doms /masters
    the way I look at it is; she is in charge RELAX, she owns you she owns the situation RELAX. this works for me and probably only me because it does challenge social convention. but one of the things that really works for me in the BDSM life style is that I feel free to find what works for me is not what most people are doing

    • For me thats true but not necessarily for everybody. Depends on what You expect or want from the relationship.
      If you are very masochistic , then male doms are your turn….dont want to generalise now….but they tend to be.

  9. This article resonates, within this one. The loss of being what this one truly is pierces the soul, and reminds me of the loss of it all.
    (i) need to change how I’m addressing to make better sense and to see if this can be expressed coming from within.
    (i) have been a natural slave all my life. (i) cannot explain why, (i) can just say I’ve done years of research and counseling of others to know it can be a inherited trait. (i) have been under ownership for a total of nearly 15 years, 5 of it was 24/7 steel collar chained. (Me/us) is a multiple as in MPD, all are slave in their own way but it’s my/our true nature, (i) also belly dance and wear bells as well.

    Going into my 6th year of 24/7 the Master up and left, across the country, he became an alcoholic, there was no warning just got a message from a hometown friend he was there, (i) had a implosion, nervous breakdown.
    5 years ago (i) was faced with a horrible stalker, that claimed to be a slave but really isn’t, (long story) however, (i) was so disgusted in what being slave was by everything and a near simotanious onset of a severe illness (i) felt like I was dropped off a cliff again.
    This one buried the need and acceptance of our true nature, and everything pierced my mind so hard (i) thought a couple alters were gone, and it didn’t help that (i) had to move away, back into my Midwest home with my kids dad.
    This one thought (i) had the need to be what we are buried. Till recently, now (i) feel like I’m in a room full of mirrors, my others are self dominating me from within, giving (us) permissions, but this won’t last, the OUT of control self destructive one will surface.
    Whom ever could say being a true nature slave was easy is so wrong. Some are born, some can try to stop but it’s no easier than telling a man or a woman to stop being a man or woman.

    (i) guess (i ) really didn’t make much of a point, perhaps me/us just felt the need to prove to myself in writing (i) can’t deny what we are no matter the horrible things that’s happen are.
    This one just counsels now to be a part and share my knowledge, someday I might even write my book…..but (i) can’t deny our nature anymore and I feel utterly useless. Thank you Sir, for being here and just letting us put our two cents in.

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