Dominance and submission  is term used to define a consensual relationship based on the concept of a power exchange between two or more people. One person, the Dominant, is in control and the other person(s) is the controlled.  The one controlled is called the submissive.  It does not have to be a male in charge or a female submissive.    This Dominant and submissive relationship is the keystone of the bdsm lifestyle.

The amount of control is determined by the individuals involved. The submissions  ights are freely given to the dominant very often after a period of  negotiation.

BDSM is not about abuse, it is about individuals that enjoy and find pleasure in each other.  It is about self discovery.  BDSM" is an acronym of " B&D " (Bondage & Discipline), " D&S " (Dominance & Submission), and " S&M " (sadomasochism).

Total Power Exchange

Total Power Exchange (TPE) means a relationship in which the submissive gives up control to the Dominant.  This is often referred to a Master/slave relation.

In a TPE relationship the  Dominant is often said to own the submissive and  often controls  what the submissive/slave can wear, when and what they eat,  where they go and who they see.

BDSM Terms  from http://www.bbc.co.uk/dna/h2g2/A583490

Terms used in the D/s lifestyle:

Dominant - The person who has been given some amount of control over the submissive. Other terms describing them are Dom and Domme.

submissive - The person who gives some amount of control to the Dominant. Other terms describing them are sub, pet and slave.

D/s - Dominance and submission. A power exchange relationship.

Lifestyle - (bdsm lifestyle) Generally those that practice D/s are part of 'the lifestyle'. It doesn't mean anything, it's just a descriptive term.

Vanilla - a non-D/s relationship.

24/7 - Living a D/s relationship 24 hours a day, seven days a week. To put it another way, you are always in a power exchange relationship.

Scene - The best way to describe this is to think of a 'scene' from a movie. This is one interaction between a Dom and a sub. It doesn't have to be sexual; all that is required is that a power exchange has taken place. Those not in a 24/7 relationship tend to have 'scenes' where the power exchange happens. Even those in 24/7 relationships can have scenes, where the exchange becomes deeper.

Top - A person who Dominates for only a scene. If you think of it as a 'one night stand' in the D/s lifestyle you wouldn't be quite correct, but it's a good start. This doesn't mean that the Top is a 'Dominant', just that the dominate for the one scene.

bottom - A person who is submissive for only a scene. This does not mean the person is always a submissive, just that they are submissive for the scene. See 'Top'.

Switch - Someone who switches between the Dominant and submissive roles.

Safewords - These are words that are used by either Dom or sub to slow down, or stop a scene. Having negotiated a safeword is very important. It means that if something is happening that makes either person uncomfortable, they can either back off a little, or stop.

Dominance and submission  is often shorten to  D&s, Ds or D/s.   It is also often defined as a set of behaviors, customs and rituals used  in dominance of submissive (s) by a Dominant.  In practice most dominants make up their own particular rules for a slave – submissive to follow.