A story of how bdsm lifestyle submission gives empowerment in a Dominant submissive relationship or a Master/slave relationship where the slave is undergoing slave training.

The empowerment of submission

by

Karen

 

I (I use capitalized and first-person pronouns simply for ease of writing, not attempting in any way to be disrespectful) am a submissive aspiring to be a slave and I had some interesting thoughts a while back when I heard some feminist friends attacking the bdsm lifestyle. Their main argument seemed to be that it pushed gender roles backwards, removing power from women and reducing them to objects. For me, though, the experience has been absolutely opposite. I find more empowerment and a growth of self-esteem and confidence in a bdsm relationship than any “vanilla” relationship I’ve ever had with a man.

In a bdsm relationship, the entire structure of that relationship is based on respect, trust, and, above all, consent. A true Dominant values his submissive or slave because he understands the gift he is being given in her submission to him. They work as a team in defined roles towards her growth in her submission, carefully pushing her limits. Reaching and surpassing these limits is an extremely liberating, not humiliating experience. You discover places within yourself that you didn’t know where there or never thought you’d be able to face and you are able to do it in a safe, supportive environment.

The Dominant provides that safety with his strength and his patience. He is strict, but only because he needs to push the submissive/slave to her very best and not allow her to accept less from herself. I find myself better able to face the outside world with confidence after experiences such as these, knowing that I am worthwhile and that I am strong within. A submissive’s admission of her weakness as a human being and her dependence on her master can be her greatest strength and the beginning of true confidence and self-worth, stripping away the false façade that we all too often wear to protect ourselves from the outside world. The way I see it, being a feminist and being a submissive are no contradiction, merely a different path.