my enslavement to my master.
…to my cage. In this section i will explain why i am a slave, the journey that brought me to where i am now (enslavement) and a look toward the future. As i am still in training and will be to some extent forever this will be constantly updated.
my wish is that this helps another to understand and realize they are not alone in their desire to serve and please and it is a wonderful experience when nurtured and allowed to grow.
[wpspoiler name="Why am I a slave?" ]
This is not about the difference between submissive and slave. i’m not going to get hung up on the differences and everyone’s definition of each is different. i will say that i have a mind and an opinion and my Master’s respect.
i am a slave because of the strong desire i have to please and serve. This desire has been misdirected most of my life. It has caused me a great deal of stress and inner turmoil by trying to make EVERYONE happy at my own expense. While this desire to please is the key to slavery it must be guided through a Master.
Before i met my Master, i directed all of my energy to pleasing my family and friends. The only one i please now is my Master and surprisingly enough this pleases me and everyone that i encounter. This makes me a stronger person and allows me more focus and direction in my life. [/wpspoiler]
Journey into slavery
[wpspoiler name="my journey into slavery" ]
Discovering my submissive side and meeting my Master my journey into slavery begins as most with a realization of my submissive nature. This came about actually through a chat room. i met a man online who liked to hang out in the “Chat Chamber Bondage Talk” chat room. i went in there to show Him that i could “hang” with Him and nothing intimidated me. The talks were interesting and stimulating (and i don’t mean that in a cyber sex type of way). i listened and met a lot of really nice people that were into the lifestyle online or real time. Ironically the man that i initially entered the room with turned out to be submissive.
i was in a relationship with an alcoholic and when he passed out, i got online. i ended the relationship and decided to take care of “me” and to find a strong man that i could respect. i have always thought that i was born in the wrong century and would be better suited to the antebellum times when women served their men. i put an ad on bondage.com on New Years Eve, 1999 and vowed not to settle for less that what i needed and deserved.
The first encounter was short and weird. He wanted me to dress like a maid and squirt me with a water gun. While this is intriguing, i knew i desired more. Also, i made Him a nervous wreck and i knew i could walk all over Him. The next lasted approximately 4 months. He introduced me to nipple clamps, a crop and thought He would introduce me to forced prostitution. He would change rules and try to trip me up so that He could punish me. He had no respect for me and pretty much told me so. i won’t go into all the details, but He went from a kind and strong Dominate male to a disgusting sick pig and i lost all respect for Him. A relationship is nothing without mutual respect.
Moving on to my Master. By the time i met Cuffsmaster, i didn’t trust Him and based our relationship upon my past experience. i met Him thinking, ok this is it, if this one turns out to be a psychopath than this is not the lifestyle for me. While we clicked from the start, i still wasn’t sure how much i trusted Him. i kept waiting for Him to change the rules on me or to trick me. i also went back and forth about this lifestyle and whether this was what i really wanted. He was patient, but everyone has their breaking point. In September of 1999 i decided that i could not handle this type of relationship and it was just too hard. i left a note and was through! He had done nothing to bring me to this point, i was just running scared of my own feelings.
Of course, you know that’s not the end of this story. We kept in touch, but He was not going to make any effort until He knew that i was sure about my commitment and not going to run. He always accused me of going to left field and Him having to drag me back home. New Years Eve 2000 – the new millennium was a turning point in my life. i committed myself totally and completely to Cuffsmaster and never ran again. Oh, i still take an occasional trip out to left field, but i don’t climb the fence and bolt anymore. [/wpspoiler]
[wpspoiler name="Journey Part II" ]The New Millennium
When my Master accepted me it was totally and completely and i was punished (justifiably) for running away from Him. He has introduced me to so much and there is still much to come. It is a continuing training process and i am always learning ways to please Him. One of the traits of a true submissive/slave is her strong desire to please. When used in a positive way it benefits not only your Master, but yourself as well. You grow into the person that you are meant to be.
Through this i am stronger, not weaker. my family no longer walks all over me and i speak my mind with family, friends, and at work. No, i’m not a total bitch, but i don’t let people control my life (that’s my Master’s job). School’s OUT i have just graduated from college, which has been the main focus of my Master and therefore my main focus. i returned to college in 1996 and in 2003 at 41, i am the first and only sibling in my family to receive a college education. Without the support of my Master (and my family) this could not have been accomplished. Master allowed a great deal of leniency through this period to allow me to focus on my studies. He offered guidance and also had to relearn statistics to help me understand this wonderful subject that i’m sure i’ll use every day! Now that i have graduated my training has become more intense and focused. [/wpspoiler]